It’s the Thanksgiving holiday weekend. Wow! What a rush: a time for food, family, friends, and fund. (Oh, I mean Fun!) Of course, the holidays bring on all kinds of excesses that build and build into all kinds of stresses (including, it seems a tendency for me to lapse into Dr. Suessisms.)

Every year at this time, clergy and lay folk alike lament the seemingly manic focus on activities, parties, home decorations, and lavish spending instead of keeping the focus on “the reason for the season.� This is, of course, a matter of faith.

Where am I going with this? I’m saying, let’s bring Faith home. Let’s hear what Faith has to say for a change. We might be surprised.

The Sunday before Thanksgiving is when we celebrate our Thanksgiving Festival. It has evolved over the past few years in the same direction that I believe our country’s self-identity needs to evolve. In our service we still honor the history and traditions of the Pilgrims, with whom our church-tradition shares a familial relationship. However, we have also begun to honor and recognize how people of many countries, ethnicities and religions have come to America and become a part of this great nation. Thanksgiving is the most widely celebrated holiday in the United States because it is not just the holiday of one faith tradition. It is a national celebration. As we mature beyond the many myths that have traditionally defined our country’s origins, we come to hold an even deeper respect for our union and the reasons for which it stands.

Michael Dowd and Connie Barlow are in Tulsa to celebrate the release of their new book, Thank God For Evolution!

As we begin our month of “Creation,� Michael agreed to join Marlin in delivering the message this week.

I have found myself in several situations over the past month recommending the film Crash to many of you. This film is about humanity’s attempts to make meaningful contact with each other and the world, sometimes even through desperate means. The film grapples with the intense human desire to move beyond the facades of everyday politeness in order to interact with that which really matters: our yearnings, our pain, our hopes, our desperation, and the core of another person. A character in the film says "We’re always behind this metal and glass. I think we miss that touch so much, that we crash into each other, just so we can feel something."

Those of us who have been touched by substance abuse are familiar with this sort of interpersonal wreckage: when those we love cannot stop themselves from drinking or using drugs. I have yet to meet a person who has not been affected by substance abuse, whether directly or through a friendship or family member. Tragically, fear and misunderstanding – the stigma we are all so familiar with – keep people from seeking care, limit public support for expanded services, and make it difficult for individuals to rebuild their lives once they are well. I believe that addiction is a disease and that the human experience in modern culture perpetuates a desire to make real contact with others and only offers cheap substitutes for that meaningful contact: drinking, drugs, shopping, video games, television. The holes in our soul cannot be filled by the idols our culture offers to us. Join me this Sunday as I explore the stigma of substance abuse and our common need for contact.

Are you different in a group than when you are alone? Something happens when two or more are gathered together. We come face to face with how we want to live out our values, and with how to best support our own needs as well as the needs of the group. When two or more are gathered we face our own desire to be accepted, seen, heard, and understood and the gamut of emotions that prevent us from taking the risk.

There has been much study about the way that human beings behave in a group: the compromises we make, the way we can be supported and strengthened to be more of who we are, and the synergy that can occur. Many groups however, are stuck in groupthink. Groupthink is a type of thought exhibited by group members who try to minimize conflict and reach consensus without critically testing, analyzing, and evaluating ideas. I have often said that we cannot be Unitarian Universalist alone. We need a religious community to hold us accountable to act out our values as we profess them to be. We need a place to test, analyze, and evaluate our beliefs.

There is such a place. There is such a process. It is in the small groups of this church. Come and explore with me how you might try on a new process for being with one another.

As summer starts to inch toward a close, most children are heading off to school. This Sunday we will have a back to school blessing for all school aged children to honor their transition into a new school year. Summer also marks transitions for adults as well, with many families moving or beginning new jobs. With this kind of transition often comes church shopping, so it is no surprise that this month, churches all around the country are filled with visitors looking for a new church home. Join me as I explain why Unitarian Universalism is a saving faith and the increasing value of our liberal religious tradition.

We are also beginning our second year together and moving into our mutual consideration about whether I will become the next called minister of this church. I thought you might want to know why I would so confidently and humbly choose to commit myself to this congregation and its leadership. I am grounded by this congregation’s history, excited by its present and inspired by the potential I see for the future, a future that I hope we will embark upon together.

One of the things I enjoy about traveling is meeting new people. Except sometimes it is awkward to have to explain what I do for living. In some of these situations I find myself wishing I could simply say I am a businessman, artist, doctor, lawyer, teacher, salesman, computer technician, cook or anything other than a Unitarian minister. Most people have preconceived notions about clergy and religion. Sometimes these notions are positive. Even so, most people don’t have a clue what Unitarian or Universalist means. I came across a number of Europeans on one trip I took this summer and with the language translations that we had to make to communicate, I have no idea what they ended up thinking I meant by Unitarian. All of these discussions have prepared me to offer a new and improved answer to why I’m a Unitarian.

In a new book I am reading called Mindless Eating, Brian Wansick reports that today "you will make more than 200 food related decisions...90% of which you won't even be aware of." Often when it comes to food, all of our intentions are thrown out the window in the name of our social lives, treating ourselves, or giving into some unexplainable craving. Wansink has spent his career studying why we mindlessly instead of mindfully eat. Through a series of experiments, he has attempted to unveil the "hidden persuaders" that change our minds about what, when, and how much we consume.

Hunger is also the central metaphor used by Gestalt Psychologist Fritz Perls. Fritz and his wife Laura co-founded the Gestalt Institute of Cleveland where I was trained. The Gestalt Model focuses on the promotion of awareness, the awareness of the unity of all present feelings and behaviors, and the contact between the self and its environment. As religious people, we strive to live each moment more aware of our inner and outer realms. Eating gives us an opportunity to be aware of how our inner and our outer worlds interrelate as well as an opportunity to integrate our own theories and theology with practice. Join me as I explore the intersection of hunger, eating, and awareness.

For the past year, our youth have been learning about the power of story. Let me say this again: Our youth have been learning about the Power of Story. They learned, many for the first time in their lives, of the occurrence of one of the worst race riots in the United States. It’s been called the 1921 Tulsa Race Riot. An event of this magnitude surely deserves attention. Yet, our youth learned that the surviving fellow human beings and their stories of suffering were effectively denied and repressed. Our youth know that in Unitarian Universalism we affirm the inherent worth and dignity of every human being. This affirmation resounds with calls for justice and then freedom. Our youth are learning how to authentically live within this call. They have been working with the Unitarian Universalist Service Committee (UUSC,) local community leaders, religious leaders, and other area youth. Such work takes courage, supported by a growing understanding of faith, tradition, and culture. On Sunday, we will celebrate this commitment to be courageous.

According to the Oklahoma State Bureau of Investigation the number of domestic violence incidents reported by law enforcement has increased by 31.8% over the last 10 years. A 24-hour snap shot of domestic violence related services in Oklahoma shows 238 adults and children found refuge in emergency domestic violence shelters, 54 adults and children were living in transitional house programs designed specifically for domestic violence survivors, 324 adults and children sought non-residential advocacy and services and 314 Domestic violence hotline calls were answered (that is 13 calls every hour for 24 hours!)

Domestic violence occurs when there is an imbalance of power in a relationship. Power does not exist in a vacuum. In examining domestic violence, we must consider the role of the culture, ethnicity, social class, immigration status, gender, religion, history, sexual orientation, level of education, etc. as it affects our worldview. Churches have played an influential role in creating the gender based assumptions of power that permeates our culture.

As Naomi R. Goldenberg writes, "Images of God dictate who will feel worthy in society and who will feel inferior, who will be respected and who will be despised, who will get easy access to the literal material goods of culture and who will have to fight for those same goods."

Special music this Sunday will include an arrangement by Sweet Honey and The Rock and an original song written by me that tells some of my own story. Join me as I explore the theological context of interpersonal violence as exhibited in domestic abuse.

There has been a lot of talk and a lot of politics regarding immigrants and aliens recently. Some people don’t think religion has anything to say about a topic as political as immigration. However, the Christian and Jewish scriptures have a lot to say about "resident aliens," foreigners in your midst; sojourners and strangers among you. In Exodus 22:21 it proclaims, "You shall not wrong or oppress a resident alien, for you were aliens in the land of Egypt." Leviticus 19:34 says, "The alien who resides among you shall be to you as the citizen among you; you shall love the alien as yourself, for you were aliens in the land of Egypt." Even the New Testament Letter to the Hebrews tells us, "Do not neglect to show hospitality to strangers, for by doing so some have entertained angels unawares." Does the fact that the Bible has a major preoccupation with the fair treatment of aliens and strangers have any bearing on the current immigration debate in our country? The rationale in the Bible that the Jews were once foreigners in a strange land, could remind the majority of Americans that most of us are the descendants of immigrants. Any debate that fuels so much passion requires a religious response.

Doug Inhofe is a long-time All Souls member, and Harvard Divinity School-trained Unitarian Universalist minister. He currently practices law here in Tulsa and frequently preaches at UU churches and fellowships in our area.

It’s Summertime, and the livin’ is easy. It’s been put that way since the 1930’s, but the idea is older yet. One of these mornings we really might rise up singing, spread our wings and take to the sky, but, hush, there’s no need to hurry. Summertime lets us lay down the burdens of modernity—a chronic dissatisfaction with what we have, an ever-present panning into the future—and gives us our lives back.

We are set free “to front only the essential facts of life�—as Thoreau suggests, to find what we seek inside ourselves, to learn what life has to teach, to gaze at God’s windows. Approached slowly, life is not boring but instructive. The need to fill it up with activity is vanquished, and the sense of living on stage, in others’ eyes, is set aside. Slowness allows this, as a way of sensing the moment, as a way of living a spiritual life, as a way of letting go of tomorrow for the sake of today.

Preaching for us during our ministers’ attendance at General Assembly is All Souls member and ordained minister, Victor Parachin.

Do you feel that you are simply drifting through life?
Do you feel that you have stepped off your path?
When faced with a fork in the road of life, do you feel you went the wrong way?
Are there too many days when you feel you’re stuck in a rut?

For those who answer ‘yes’ to any of the above questions, there is this good news: Tomorrow doesn’t have to be the same as yesterday!

Transformation can take place. Change can occur. Resurrection to a new way of life is possible. Rather than cling tenaciously to old ways or resisting the new and different, we can respond to the Universe (or God or A Higher Power) when it is leading us to a resurrection experience.

This Sunday we’ll look at some ways resurrection to new life still happens today in the lives of people. Their own experiences bear witness to the truth that tomorrow doesn’t have to be the same as yesterday!

Since Father’s Day always falls on Sunday, for ministers and for their families it is always a work day. Luckily for Marlin, this week he is vacationing in Colorado with Anitra and Elias and celebrating their private time as a family. Marlin will return in time to write his Father’s Day sermon and to prepare to leave for the Unitarian Universalist Association’s annual meeting. This year our General Assembly is in Portland, Oregon. Marlin will lead a workshop on our latest book from Jenkin Lloyd Jones Press, Living a Call – Ministers and Congregations Together. Even if you are not able to attend General Assembly, you can pick up the book from the Book Table on Sunday mornings or from the office during the week.

We are fortunate, as a congregation, to have the opportunity to interact with our senior minister both as a father and a son. Three generations of Lavanhar men have touched the lives of many in this church.

This week may we be aware of those who have been fathers to us, and may those who have the opportunity to be father, stepfather, or father figure awaken to the significance and the joy of their role.

It’s June – a traditional month for weddings. Our family just celebrated the marriage of our eldest child, our daughter. There was a glorious sunset, a fragrant ocean breeze, and a beautiful couple who adore each other. How amazing to be a witness to their love and commitment when it seems only yesterday our daughter was racing from one Disney ride to another. Emotions ebb and flow like the sea and feel just as deep. Time seems to hang suspended as we share in our daughter and our new son-in-law’s joy.

Moments such as these are precious and sacred. Please join us this Sunday as we consider the act and the art of receiving. The best gifts are those that are shared.

I have described my own theology as rational mysiticism, religious humanism, and even described myself as a Gestalt theist. Coming away from the Sacred Activism conference, I have been engaged in more and more conversations with how it is possible to be both rational and mystical. My spiritual journey has included the pendulum swing from blind faith to an obstinate skeptical atheism. Reason has proved to me again that the extremes of any polarity leave out the depth and breadth of the human experience. I would argue that religious idolatry and idolatry of the mind are equally as dismissive to the big picture of our existence. Award winning Journalist John Horgan has written a book called Rational Mysticism that explores how science, theology, and philosophy all attempt to formulate an empirical explanation about the meaning of life. Come and explore with me how to link the mind of a skeptic with the heart of seeker.

One of my favorite memories of growing up Unitarian Universalist was the flower communion service each spring. Before church my brother and I would go into the backyard and cut flowers from our garden, one for each member of our family. We carefully brought the flowers to church and deposited them into a basket on our way into the sanctuary. The part I liked best was getting to choose someone else�s flower from the colorful array to take home. This special service was created in Czechoslovakia prior to WWII. Here at All Souls we celebrate the flower communion each Mother�s Day.

Another All Souls tradition is the Mother�s Day brunch. This year it is being hosted by our Youth Group and the money they raise will go to help fund their upcoming Spirit Quest trip. Please bring a flower and join us for this festive celebration.

Driving around Tulsa we can see huge billboards that read, "Birth Control is Harmful." These are countered by other billboards that say, "Birth Control is Easy." The first slogan and its implications are much more harmful than birth control itself. The second slogan is inadequate in its response to the first. There are enormous moral issues at stake in this debate and they require more than a billboard campaign. Sex is not a sin. However, religious dogmas that lead to overpopulation, increased poverty and the spread of AIDS and other sexually transmitted diseases (such as a ban on birth control) is a sin of deadly proportions. Religions that promote ideologies that inadvertently lead to suffering and death are much more harmful than religions that advocate for responsible sexual behavior. You may hear more about sex this Sunday than you have ever heard in church before. Well, at least more positive comments about sex.

In 1970 Earth Day began and since then environmentalism has become a part of the fabric of American life. Today, environmental concerns influence how we live, what we buy and who we vote for. Nevertheless, there is no popular consensus on what is an appropriate moral response to the current situation. There is even a lot of confusion about what is the current situation. Even so, Americans know that environmental stewardship is important, yet we differ on the depth of our commitments to living in environmentally responsible ways. Religions, which claim to support life and be concerned with relieving suffering, have been slow to respond to issues of the environment. Is it an anti-scientific bias in religion, an unwillingness to challenge their members’ lifestyles, or is it a fundamental worldview which has kept religion from being a prophetic voice on the environment? There is a growing "green" awakening in American life that is finally penetrating mainstream religion. Even at All Souls we are rethinking our relationship to the environment and looking into the question of "How green are we?"

Nothing doesn’t seem to mean nothing these days. When we say we are doing nothing, often we are actually daydreaming, spending time with loved ones, resting, living. This kind of nothing can create our most meaningful experiences. When asked about the impact of some event on our lives I am often greeted with the answer: "It’s nothing," when the circumstances and all affectual cues say otherwise.

In Eat, Pray, Love, Elizabeth Gilbert illustrates the guilt associated with indulging in pleasure. Gilbert goes to Italy in search of pleasure after a messy divorce. When she arrives however, she find that it takes time to allow herself to settle into any pleasure because she is too used to working hard, being responsible, and maintaining a disciplined grip on her life. She writes, "During my first few weeks in Italy, all my Protestant synapses were zinging in distress, looking for a task. I wanted to take on pleasure like a homework assignment. I pondered such questions as, 'How is pleasure most efficiently maximized?'" She goes on to say, "Generally speaking, Americans have an inability to relax into sheer pleasure. Ours is an entertainment-seeking nation, but not necessarily a pleasure-seeking one. By contrast, the Italians are the masters of Bel far niente - the beauty of doing nothing."

When I was growing up I used to prefer Christmas to Easter. Christmas included candy and lots of presents, and Easter included lots of candy and a few presents (mostly clothes). Now that I am more interested in the spiritual side of the holidays, my appreciation has shifted towards Easter.

One metaphorical way to understand the spiritual significance of Christmas is that it symbolizes the birth of hope and an awareness of holiness in us and in our world. Easter, on the other hand, represents the rebirth of hope and holiness in the aftermath of painful experiences such as betrayal, death and loss. The renewal of hopefulness after walking through the valley of the shadow of death and despair has a spiritual maturity that comes from encounters with life's most poignant and painful experiences.

In the Jewish Passover ritual, green herbs are dipped in salt water and then eaten. The green plant represents hope and new life while the saltwater represents the tears that were shed during the Jews captivity prior to their passage to freedom. Renewed hope in the aftermath of tears is the kind of gift any of us can appreciate.

May the deeper spiritual significance of this season become real for all with open minds and hearts.

Over the past few years more and more people have made All Souls their religious community. The current Membership Book that new members sign upon joining the church has over 500 signatures since November of 2000. We've seen our attendance and activities grow considerably during that same time. Today, many people shuttle to church from the BOK parking lot on Peoria. The official statistics show 1457 adult members, which is up from 1017 in January of 2001. Our newsletter goes out to over 1800 households each week. Other than having a sign in front of the church (since 2004) and a website with information, we do very little to intentionally grow or promote the congregation. Nevertheless, people keep coming and finding meaning among us, and each time they do they add to the depth and breadth of our community. Of course we have a Newcomers Committee and many of you take turns as greeters and ushers. The questions we will be exploring on Sunday include: Is our hospitality intentional or accidental? What does it mean to be an inviting and welcoming community? If there are more people in Tulsa who are yearning for a free-thinking, justice centered, inclusive community rooted in love and service, what is our role in offering such a gift? If such a church can add value and meaning and hope to more people's lives, what can we do to share it? What is your welcome?

What matters to us is what makes us unique. Our preferences, our likes and dislikes, drive us to make choices about what and who we value. Earlier this month Rumi scholar and poet Andrew Harvey joined us for a Sunday morning conversation to talk about his idea of Sacred Activism. Harvey makes a powerful argument about the current state of the world and our power as Americans to influence global change. At that Sunday morning conversation he challenged those present to focus on what breaks their heart.

The state of the world may give us a general dis-ease, may cause an uncomfortable state of anxiety. What unjustice, what circumstance touches you so deeply that it literally breaks your heart whenever you really consider it? For me, it is this heartbreak, tied to our own experience, tied to our own values, that points us to our own call to serve, that points us to the heart of the matter. That which has broken our hearts is what will serve as the fuel to change the world. Come and explore your heartbreak with me.

When we discover something that brings our world alive, the feeling is contagious. It is what the poet Hafiz referred to as catching the "Happy Virus." In his poem by that name; Hafiz talks of catching the happy virus during a night of singing beneath the stars. Knowing he is contagious, Hafiz says, "Kiss me!" He exudes a generosity of spirit that says, I have something so valuable and so infectious that I just want to share it with whomever is willing.

The community of All Souls is sometimes like a fortunate fever that catches us and sets our world on fire. Yet, we too often have an aversion to sharing this contagious kiss. What is it that creates a virus-like phenomenon in a community that spreads beauty and generosity and kindness through our world?

Hanukkah is also known as the Jewish festival of lights. Many traditions around the globe have holidays that are celebrated with lights during this dark time of year. Some people mistakenly think that Hanukkah is simply a celebration of a combat victory for the Jews. However, the story has many significant themes from which religious liberals can draw inspiration.

It is a story about standing up for what you believe and it offers a reminder not to remain silent in the face of oppression, and not to surrender one's rights or identities. For the Jews it also marks the end of Greek rule over the Temple in Jerusalem. The story includes a miracle. The lamp in the temple is said to have burned for eight days even though it only had oil for one more day.

In this season of miracles and lights, there is a lot at the heart of Hanukkah to inspire us and fill us with hope.

Living in fear can be debilitating. Fear can be used to control and manipulate people. Since the attacks of September 11, 2001, there has been a new level of public fear in the United States that has caused some Americans to be willing to give up certain rights and freedoms. No doubt, a fear of weapons of mass destruction in the hands of Saddam Hussein helped create the political will that perpelled American troops into Iraq. Fear of hell in the next life keeps some people going to church (not our church however!).

Yet, fear is not all bad and all fear is not equal. In our culture there is a fear of fear. Therefore, fear has an uneccesarily bad reputation. In my sermon, "Be Not Afraid," one of the points is to not be afraid of fear.